Book & Audiobook
Personal Development Book and Articles Based on Experience
As a clinical psychology author, Dr. Van Schoyck publishes literary works on diverse topics that leverage his professional and learned experiences. He wrote Looking For Your Self In All The Wrong Places: How to Recognize Your Authentic Self To Live On Your Terms, a personal development book that Newtown, PA, clients and beyond use as a complementary resource to psychotherapy treatments and independent reading material. Released in 2019, it is available in both paperback and Kindle formats.
Book Overview
Dr. Van Schoyck, a clinical psychologist with over 42 years of experience, provides a path to follow the Oracle of Delphi's 3,000-year-old advice: "Know thyself." Self-identity is paramount to managing emotions, making decisions, and presenting your true self to the world — though this is often easier said than done.
At the core of this journey is the recognition that you have two distinct selves, each with different emotions that serve as the base to guide your behavior. The first is the Self For Others, which is formed by perceiving yourself through your parents' eyes, leading to reactions steeped in fear, guilt, and shame when their rules are broken. These are considered learned emotions. In contrast, the Authentic Self emerges from a desire to express your natural reactions and emotions, such as joy, sadness, and anger. These natural reactions frequently clash with parental demands.
The emotions of both selves vie for dominance in influencing your decisions, with the Self For Others often holding sway due to years of ingrained conditioning. To honor your Authentic Self, you must pay attention to its quieter voice and disregard the louder, learned emotions.
At the core of this journey is the recognition that you have two distinct selves, each with different emotions that serve as the base to guide your behavior. The first is the Self For Others, which is formed by perceiving yourself through your parents' eyes, leading to reactions steeped in fear, guilt, and shame when their rules are broken. These are considered learned emotions. In contrast, the Authentic Self emerges from a desire to express your natural reactions and emotions, such as joy, sadness, and anger. These natural reactions frequently clash with parental demands.
The emotions of both selves vie for dominance in influencing your decisions, with the Self For Others often holding sway due to years of ingrained conditioning. To honor your Authentic Self, you must pay attention to its quieter voice and disregard the louder, learned emotions.
When the Self For Others wins out, you fall into the prescribed roles of hero and scapegoat learned in family settings and replicate these patterns in all your relationships. This suppression of genuine emotions leads you to lose your connection to your Authentic Self, resulting in rigidity, denial, communication issues, and a loss of trust — all primary contributors to anxiety and depression.
Nurturing the Authentic Self is the key to a healthier version of yourself with better relationships and lower levels of anxiety and depression. Dr. Van Schoyck details the steps to facilitate this growth, focusing on enhancing self-awareness and understanding the interplay between emotions, thoughts, and behaviors. By grasping how your mind works with your feelings, you position yourself to truly "know thyself" and live authentically on your terms.
Nurturing the Authentic Self is the key to a healthier version of yourself with better relationships and lower levels of anxiety and depression. Dr. Van Schoyck details the steps to facilitate this growth, focusing on enhancing self-awareness and understanding the interplay between emotions, thoughts, and behaviors. By grasping how your mind works with your feelings, you position yourself to truly "know thyself" and live authentically on your terms.
Explore the First Two Chapters of This Personal Development Book
Access the first two chapters of Looking For Your Self In All The Wrong Places: How to Recognize Your Authentic Self To Live On Your Terms by downloading its self-help audiobook version for free.
Library of Articles
Explore the collection of articles authored by Stephen R. Van Schoyck Ph.D Clinical Psychology on various topics, such as personal improvement, relation development, and more. Feel free to print out any documents you wish to keep for future reference or share with friends.
Why You Do What You Do: How The Founding Fathers, Not Freud, Got It Right
How To Let Go of Repressed
Anger
Why Decision Making Fails So Often When You Don’t Trust Your Gut
How Does Self-Reliance Differ From Selfishness?
Through The Looking Glass: 7 Benefits To Seeing Yourself Through Your Emotions
Self-Reliance vs Self-Sufficiency: The Difference Is Critical To Your Happiness
How Decision Making Affects Your Life Positively and Negatively
5 Tips To Learn How To Trust
Your Gut
5 Ways to Recognize Your Real
Self
What Anxiety And Depression Are Trying To Tell You